“There is never a majestic mountain without a deep valley, and there is no birth without pain.” Daniel Crawford.
There was a day several months ago when I wept. I cried like I haven’t cried since my dad passed away eight years ago. A floodgate opened and I couldn’t close it. Every direction I looked that morning revealed loss- broken bodies, bleeding hearts, flaring tempers, empty chairs, and strained relationships among people I deeply cared about.
This load was too heavy for me to carry. I didn’t know what to do with all this pain, so I asked my Lord for help. I was at the end of myself – which is often where we recognize our desperate and constant need of a Savior. God gently and faithfully lifted my eyes to Him and gave my heart reason to hope again.
I couldn’t see a reason for hope in this situation. But I knew that my ‘eye-sight’ was not the same as my God’s. His wisdom is infinite – mine is finite and tainted with life experiences, emotions, and sin. I knew He could be trusted. So, one by one, I handed Him my tears – surrendering my will in this situation. I exchanged it for intimacy with my Lord who’d suffered far worse. It wasn’t easy but it was freeing. I left that room knowing this was the beginning of something new. One small act of faithfulness resulted in absolute peace. I didn’t know where My God was leading me, but I knew with certainty I would never walk alone.
What Lies Beneath
My husband loves to flyfish for large, ugly, stinky carp at a reservoir close to our home. (Not to provide a meal for the family, but to catch and release.) The problem with this type of fishing is that there are only two conditions where the fish can be seen and therefore, caught. The first is after a storm – which causes everything to be chaotic initially but then settle into a peaceful stillness. The second is light. The sun has to return from behind the clouds and shine directly above the water to reveal what’s under the surface. The storms cause both chaos and stillness. The light reveals what’s under the surface. Likewise, it can often take both a ‘storm’ and the One True Light to expose what’s underneath the surface of each of us.
A Forced Reset
The past couple of years have exposed the prevalence of sin, pain, sorrow, fear, discouragement, and hopelessness in our world and our churches. These things have always been part of this life, but a global pandemic followed by intense racial battles, unprecedented political divisions, and reported abuses in the Church have illuminated darkness. We’ve seen the vanity of this life. It’s been challenging to not get weighed down with the heaviness of the past couple of years – to feel as I felt the day I wept – when all I could see was loss.
Although I believe it is healthy to grieve our losses, I don’t believe God wants us to stay in that season of grief or hopelessness. Instead, I believe 2020 ushered in a far greater purpose for God’s children. It has authenticated the Church by refining us individually and exposing sins that were always bound to be revealed because we serve a God of Truth. These circumstances have caused many of us to closely examine what we believe and why we believe it, and to ask ourselves how we can make a difference for God’s glory in this post-modern, post-2020 world.
The intensity of the past couple of years forced us to examine and apply our Biblical worldview with constant adversity. And although I’ve known great disappointment, I’ve also seen true beauty in women who (like me) were tired of superficiality and longing for meaningful relationships. There’s been a forced awareness that life is fleeting, and that only the things we do for Christ will last. I’ve cherished loyalty, honesty, and kindness like never before. And I’ve thanked God that He saw fit to include ‘encouragement’ as a Spiritual gift. People who used that gift to edify Christ’s body in this season were lifesavers.
The Dance of Joy and Sorrow
The fellowship I’ve had with women as we’ve walked through trials has been undeniably painful but also incredibly meaningful. God comforts us in our heartaches so that we may extend that same tender-loving care to others when they suffer. This life is a constant dance between joy and sorrow. We love and we lose, we laugh and we cry, we sing and we fall silent, we wrestle and we surrender. Yet, through it all we must persevere. That perseverance is what ultimately strengthens our character and sanctifies our souls. And the closer we walk with Jesus, the more we desire to become like Him, which includes a longing for deep friendships and authentic conversations. This is precisely where our story began.
Several conversations sharing our hearts with one another led a couple of my friends and me to intentionally seek God’s will for a new ministry. We were astonished when doors were unexpectantly opened, and with the realization that we were like-minded regarding what and who we believed God wanted this ministry created for. ‘She’ is a woman we have each been, and ‘she’ may be you right now. We loved ‘her’ so much that we finally “took a leap of faith” in July of 2022.
Kris Katzmann, Sarah Hamilton, and I launched Women of The Way. Our goal is to share our stories of suffering and hope, living, learning, growing, and walking in the ways of our glorious God. Our desire is that our writings and podcasts will be authentic, filled with genuine joy, encouraging, helpful, and thought-provoking. Because whether we are currently living through a tumultuous storm or resting in the stillness of God’s grace, we always need assurance of our blessed hope. We need friends who point us to truth and encourage our weary hearts.
It is often our greatest pain that births our greatest joy. And there is no greater joy than walking together in the way our precious Lord has led us. We’d love for you to join us on this pilgrimage!
